I was privy to be a part of the Money Cloud Reports Meeting (MCRM) which held at California this year. Stay with me.
God arrived quite late because He had to attend to a last minute emergency that came up in Africa’s most populous country. No name calling… Yet. While waiting, I watched angels troop in, clutching annual reports to their chests and rehearsing their speeches to the tune of five minutes. God was not going to take long speeches.
“The human year already has a day and a half missing”, He was fond of telling the angels.
I was told that the MCRM always had seven Archangels in attendance as board members with God to review reports, attend to Money Cloud issues and dispatch instructions and adjustments as necessary. The Archangels were not hard to spot; their wings had gold tinged edges and their eyes were gold, more easily defined and ‘normal’ than God’s eyes but way more ‘abnormal’ than the reporting angels whose ocean blue eyes sparkled when they were excited or very pleased and paled to a weird off white when they were sad. They were not permitted to get angry.
As a representative of humans, I was given special shades to protect my eyes and I was lovingly told to keep them on, especially when God was around. “His glow is… different.”
When He arrived, the Archangels and the reporting angels all fell to their knees and I thought it was customary till I felt my knees hit the ground and my arms lifting to shield my eyes. It was not customary to kneel, it was a compelling thing.
“Rise. We have issues to attend to… Starting with Angel Jahel’s absence at this meeting. Again.”
I am not so bad with numbers and I was sure there were numerous angels in that room. He was not the only missing angel as I was told; some were in their reeling moments, some were on outside postings, some had taken special permissions to be absent. But, angel Jahel’s case… well. Angel Jahel was in charge of Nigeria’s Money Cloud.
Okay. Before I lose you completely, let me explain the Money Cloud.
Remember that in the Old Testament, men did not have much to do with money. Once they had their daily bread/meat, they were okay. Which is why of all the special things done for the Israelites while they were traveling the desert from Egypt to the Promised Land, the bread from heaven was the only one that got a unique name; Manna. However, the world grew, countries and civilizations sprang up and money became a thing.
Unbeknownst to us, humans, there is a Money Cloud hanging over each country. Each and every country.
The concept is like the Bible story in John 5:1-7. Once in a while, the angel in charge of the Money Cloud, at his own discretion (although with due permission obtained from God) stirs the cloud and allows money drop. Businesses boom, profits rise, people get rich, balance sheets are tilted towards the right side. More than anything, the citizens are balanced out financially, such that no one is too poor, no one is too rich.
Remember, in the manna incidence, the people were told to pick just enough. Too little and hunger was your portion. Too much and you got to deal with rot. Now, instead of leaving it to the people to be smart to take just enough, the MARC (Angel Reeling the Money Cloud) gets to determine how much is let down and how it is distributed.
So, are you getting my drift about Angel Jahel and his crucial role to Nigeria?
“Michael… What was your explanation again?
Yeah, Angel Michael was Arch over Africa and responsible for Jahel and the other 53 MARCs in Africa.
“Jahel asked me to cover for him while…”
“That is some audacity, asking his Arch to cover for him. And that is some rapport, you accepting to do so. But, I interrupt, go on…”
“… while he went on study leave.”
“Study leave. I like that. You all know I encourage continuous learning. So, he went to Canada, I assume?”
“Yes, Popcy. He promised to be back in two years.”
“Of course. Did he also promise to restore the missing Money Cloud over Nigeria? Surely, you are aware that … it is missing. The whole Money Cloud of 190 million plus people… is missing.”
Archangel Michael’s gold eyes were blazing hot. No one had to explain to me his anger and embarrassment.
The North American Archangel had this smirk plastered across his face and I knew he was itching to nail the top over Michael’s coffin on this case. The angels called him Truffle-Buff. His MARCs always had clean reports and their speeches were fine tuned to the perfect second. If the other MARCs figured God needed a cooling, they often pushed them to go first with their speeches.
Of course, his best MARC was none other than Candace. You got that right.
Yes, MARC over Canada.
Yes, absolutely gorgeous.
“Candace, how about you get us all up to speed on Angel Jahel’s study leave so far?”
“Yes, Popcy. Angel Jahel, now known and addressed as Jamiu…”
That is where I passed out.